Monday, April 13, 2009

A Revelation

time away has afforded me a bit of perspective.

lambasting the poor and ignorant of Nebraskashire was not cruel because I, despite my now elevated rank, was once so afflicted. therefore, I could astutely critique such a life.

the same is not true of the rusticates of Misboury. unable to speak with authority, my comments here have been altogether less diverting for me and assuredly tedious for readers, mere shadows of my former wit.

in short, my invectives are no longer so personally fulfilling.

thus I will put my knowledge to use, providing guidance to any who seek to be, even a modicum, more genteel.

Tuesday, March 31, 2009

A Brief Hiatus

though beneath my dignity to admit so, the demands of the next fortnight may require more even than I can provide.

I shall suspend my commentations on the churlish inhabitants of this district until after Easter, as the majority of the season's most exclusive social events take place during Holy Week.

Thursday, March 26, 2009

An Allegory

T. H. White's King Arthur is not dissimilar to a certain former American President whose inheritance and ambition belied a genuinely simple nature.

yet the conscientious reader does not extend the metaphor further.

two characteristics clearly distinguish these men; White's King Arthur is not prideful and he is guided by the perpetually-retrospective Merlyn (rather than Uther Pendragon incarnate).

Tuesday, March 24, 2009

Blithely Breakfasting

in more southerly regions, one must alter the adage common among groundskeepers of Nebraskashire to "March showers bring April flowers".

Saturday, March 21, 2009

The Once and Future King

I have begun reading a rather heady novel.

I am fortunate not to have read the book as a youth. in my immaturity, I would have been impressed by its deprecating humor and preoccupation with thaumaturgy.

reading it now, I appreciate its bucolic setting, royal characters and righteous message.

indeed, my character would have been much attenuated had I read this novel, rather than The Pilgrim's Progress and The Faerie Queene, early in life.

Tuesday, March 17, 2009


though not raised in exaltation, this sign reminds passers-by of a once-popular group of ignoramuses - men too simple to recognize that ultimately their goals would be achieved legislatively and economically, without all that undignified violence and commotion.

Sunday, March 15, 2009

Quis Custodiet Ipsos Custodes?

normally, my book list is restricted to classic novels, travel accounts and the newest scientific research.

this weekend I read a contemporary work of fiction.

it was, in a word, resplendent.

Friday, March 13, 2009


the articulation of so many beliefs on one vehicle undermines their persuasive power. while they share a common theme, their abundance suggests superficiality, a lack of dedication to any one idea.

Wednesday, March 11, 2009

A Recluse Once Made His Home Here

as my sister, Shaler Marie Van der Hoof Caddingham, said of the good-natured hermit newly installed at her estate, "his distinct odor, a mixture of gin and human expulsion, comforts as much as it revolts".

Tuesday, March 3, 2009


well-intentioned, straightforward and possessed of a racism tempered by a predisposition to fairness, Harry S. Truman reminds me of my grandfather.

William Nichol Joshua Caddingham was given two middle names, a distinction equaling any bestowed Harry Truman during his tenure
at the White House.

William Caddingham was a great man. his monument, like Truman's, can scarcely immortalize such a life.

Sunday, March 1, 2009


en route to Kansas City for the weekend, I stopped at a quaint restaurant in Odessa of which I had heard much.

though its proprietor seems a rather unscrupulous little Irishman disposed to world domination, there I enjoyed a delicious cup of coffee at a very reasonable price.

Friday, February 27, 2009

Mass Transport

pedestrian from without, the inside teems with all manner of human refuse, primarily transients and the unwashed.

Wednesday, February 25, 2009


a folk hero of some means and stature (though ill-gotten and among vermin and apologists, respectively), the abstemiousness of Jesse James surprised me.

as is apparent from his quarters, for more than quarters they certainly are not, he lived only on the plunder of a brief career in larceny,
receiving not remuneration for the reproduction of his image nor intonation of his deeds.

perhaps because those most willing to distribute such artifacts and recount such gruesome tales are those least able to pay.

Monday, February 23, 2009

Hardly The Kennel Club

I reside somewhere between two, in the vernacular of the region, KCs.

such oblique agnomina were the source of great consternation initially.

I now distinguish them as KC the Lesser and KC the Even Lesser.

Saturday, February 21, 2009


none who enter this confounding structure emerge unaltered.

many maddening hours have I spent endeavoring to escape its
aphotic depths.

Thursday, February 19, 2009

Misleading Monikers

although its name suggests otherwise, this community is situated nowhere near a body of water. still, it is more diverting than Newport.

despite Newport's propitious location, the society one must keep there makes even sailing around the sound most tedious.

Tuesday, February 17, 2009

We Shall Defend Our Island

although I applaud any who comment, I wish in this case the criticism were more substantive.

I shudder to think I should one day read that a post possessed a shocking lack of satin.

Sunday, February 15, 2009

The Lost World

if there is any knowledge to be gained from popular literature, it is that this lavatory provides no refuge from raptors.

Wednesday, February 11, 2009


I know none who has ventured south of Florence on the Italian peninsula. and, though an actor, I have no reason to suspect The Bard of doing something so shocking.

his knowledge of the country seems confined to the northern regions.

thus I doubt he has ever even tasted a "slice".

Monday, February 9, 2009

The Rules of the Game

this graffiteur has attempted to illuminate some great hypocrisy. yet I cannot understand the employ of such evocative language nor the existence of such palpable ire.

anyone privy to the unfortunate end of Miss Lily Bart already knows to be true what the artist hopes to lay bare.

further, such disregard for decorum and prudence reveals the artist is no gentleman and therefore can hardly judge any of our number.

Saturday, February 7, 2009


though not one to exhaust himself with hypotheses, I believe I have come upon the fundamental difference between the inhabitants of Nebraskashire and those of Misboury. under the guise of mere historic significance, each district idolizes a different man whose ideals thusly manifest in the souls and pursuits of every person and institution of the region.

in Misboury, Thomas Jefferson guides the populace ever to desire that beyond what is, expanding the known from the banks of the Mississippi River to the beaches of the Pacific Ocean and risking much in so doing.

Nebraskashire reveres another whose greatest desire was to preserve and protect what was already possessed.

Thursday, February 5, 2009

Tuesday, February 3, 2009

Law Firm of the Lesser Ivies

should a gentleman require legal counsel, the law firm of Yale, Stanford and Knox is the only option.

Sunday, February 1, 2009

Oil Paintings

though the subject is rather awkwardly posed and his painter lacks the command of composition of a great artist, I am intrigued by the familiarity of the scene.

I too sit, bespectacled, amid my many leather bound books and read by the sunlight of a clear winter's day.

Friday, January 30, 2009

An International House of Pancakes?

excluding God's eyes and certain former American presidents, I can think of no things with less international appeal than the two this establishment provides: indecipherable acronyms and pancakes.

Wednesday, January 28, 2009


having only ever heard what I suspected were largely exaggerated accounts of these giants, finally seeing one gave me an unexpected thrill.

Monday, January 26, 2009

A Bleak Midwinter

despite many undeniably Southern attributes, Misboury could never truly be characterized as such because it lacks both of what I consider that region's greatest amenities: a warm climate and segregation.

Saturday, January 24, 2009

Thomas Jefferson

as yet the only figure in the whole of Misboury for whom I have more than a superficial affection. my solitude requires me to be less judicious and overlook his obvious deficiencies.

I suppose one cannot always help if one's friends have an acute affinity for the French.

Thursday, January 22, 2009

The University of Misboury

the district's noble effort to combat ignorance, a characteristic present in the people of nearly every segment of Misbourian society.

Tuesday, January 20, 2009

And Still

these legal professionals primarily represent cattle rustlers, those injured in accidents at textile mills and the intoxicated.